We have all lost a friend

Donald J Ottenburg - 20th August 2004

Broekaert, E., Vandevelde, S. and Yates, R. (2005) Dr. D. J. Ottenburg, friend and humanitarian: a personal account of a therapeutic community pioneer, International Journal of Therapeutic Communities, 26, 2,
pp. 215-224.

Memories

Our friend, Donald J. Ottenberg, died last Friday. I remember him as a friend and mentor. As always in this kind of things...words are reductive. I'll miss him

Salvatore Raimo
Italy

Ambros Uchtenhagen
Switzerland

Eric Broekaert
Universiteit Gent, Belgium

Martien Kooyman
Emiliehoeve (founder), the Netherlands

Peter Martin
Addaction, England

Carl Leukefeld
University of Kentucky, USA

What sad news. With our total reliance on so-called evidence-based enterprises, would the voice of Donald J. Ottenburg be heard if he was starting out in the UK contract culture drug field of 2004? Sadly not, I fear.....Much love,

Mary Treacy
Festival Welfare, England

Tears come but sweet memories too. I remember not only a good counsellor and mentor but a lovable and loyal friend who took it upon himself to ensure that I wasn't wandering round Warsaw alone when I had been unwell - and then got us totally lost because he was holding the map upside-down! I remember also the wry smile and the twinkling eye as he commiserated with my son Calum - such rotten luck getting dumped with me for a father. Finally I remember with fondness Don's advice for all travellers: Never, ever pass by a public toilet without using it. Miss you Don.

Rowdy Yates
University of Stirling, Scotland

I'm sad because he was for me and Trempoline like a father. Don was a warm person always with a smile and a lot of humour. I wish him a good stay near his wife in heaven

Ruud Bruugeman
Trempoline, Belgium

I first met Don in the early 1970s when we were both presenting at national conferences on a radical notion known as "combined treatment" (mixing alcoholics and addicts within an integrated treatment milieu). We became friends and our paths crossed regularly over the intervening decades. I have particularly warm memories of my visits with Don at the many Eagleville conferences. I interviewed Don at length in the early 1990s for research I was doing on the history of treatemnt. He was one of the true pioneers of modern treatment. His vision, compassion and intensity will be sorely missed.

Bill White
Chestnut Health Systems, USA

Dear Don, Dear family of Don, To whom can we say thank you for having met Don? Since 20 years, we have had the chance that our path crossed regularly: congresses, Corso base in Italy, visits, projects... His very friendly presence helped us a lot in building our professionnal foundations and self confidence. We keep him in our memory as a very inspiring human being of pragmatic intelligence, of fidelity to his own beliefs and of irresitible charm. He is now with Martha and we feel - a little bit - members of his family. Thank you Don,

Georges van der Straten, Ruud Bruugeman & Christian Schennen
Trempoline, Belgium

Many condolences from "De Klimop", OPZ Rekem, Belgium. He was of great importance to the TC world.

Jos Sybbens
DeKlimop , Belgium

I remember Don as a very warm and gentle person. He gave me very important feedback on my work. It was a pleasure beeing around him. My condolence to the family and the rest off the TC world. We have all lost a true friend.

Karsten Hald
Samtun & NFTC, Norway

I will always remember Don as a father and as a teacher. I wish his family a lot of strength during this hard time. However for me, Don will never pass away, in every good TC worker I will be confroted with parts of Don. Don in the name of thousands of ex-addicts, thanks a lot!!!

Alphonse Franssen
Addiction Care East Flanders, Belgium

I remember Don as an honest man, stong in belief and a great humanitarian. He was one of the first within the TC movement to warn about misuse of power. I also remember an intense discussion with him about compulsory treatment in Sweden and he said "Vera it is not possible, it does not work!"

Vera Segraeus
SoRAD, Stockholm University, Sweden

On behalf of the members and staff of KETHEA's treatment programme, I would like to express our sorrow for the loss of Donald Ottenburg. He will always be remembered for his great contribution to the T.C. movement.

Charalampos Poulpoulos
KETHEA, Greece

Donald was a unique person, he had the gift of making each person feel at home when with him. He shared his knowlege - experience and at times his doubts quite freely, without an expectation of something in return. His contribution to the field will be remembered through those who knew him and through his published work. The recipient of the first E.F.T.C Award in 2001 for his truly amazing contribution to thereapeutic communities, was a small yet unanimous response of respect - love and recognition to the professional and the man. Donald will be missed by many - in many ways - mentor - friend - wonderfull humourist. Always available to listen. I shall miss him greatly.

Anthony Slater
President, European Federation of Therapeutic Communities

I passed a night, during his last visit in Italy, hearing Don and my wife discussing his passion for bird watching. He flew faraway, but he left us a lot of precious advice and he drew important paths for our work. Another item of Don's advice (not only) for travellers: "Ask, ask, ask, then ask again". And a warning for the obsessive person: "A clean desk is expression of a poor mind".

Andrea Ascari
CEIS Modena, Italy

I feel very sad and will miss Don`s wisdom and challenges that have been of great importance for me since I met him and Martha for the first time during the '70s. Both Martha and Don, this fantastic couple taught me a lot - not only about drug treatment but also how to get along as a strong man and a strong women in a marriage. And Don also gave a lot of input and inspiration just a couple of years ago when he worked with me in Sweden with issues about how to strengthen civil societal organisations. It`s so sad that this great humanist and mentor is no longer looking at all of us with his fantastic smiling and wise eyes anymore.

Bam Björling
Kvinnoforum (Foundation for Women´s Forum), Sweden

Thank you, Donald, for having the privilege to get to know you! You made a difference in my life. We knew each other from many years back through the EFTC movement, but only in your late years we got acquainted in a very personal way. I have some very nice and live "pictures" of you in my mind that I will never forget. One is from a very, very early morning in Mestre, Italy, when only you and me were left in a kind of camp after a meeting. No telefones, no taxis - how should we get out of there? Well, I had foreseen the situation the day before and had got help to order a taxi to pick me up next morning to go to the airport. Donald had not, and was going to meet Eric Broekaert somewhere far away later. Well,he then had to get up as early as me, and went with me to talk to the taxi driver to please pick him up later in the morning. Donald was still in his white kind of pyjamas, unlaced white tennis shoes and a white scarf thrown around the neck in some sort of Italian way...! He looked like a character in a film of Fellini and also acted much the same.... It was a beautiful, crisp, cold morning with dew in the grass, in May, I think. We had to wait for the taxi quite a long time. After a while an Italian tractor driver turned up and joined in for some reason. A long discussion between Donald and the tractor guy developed about smoking, gasoline etc etc - totally absurd -I have never laughed so much in my life...I also have sweet memories from Venice together with Donald. He, Marjolaine and me were sightseeing in Venice a whole afternoon and evening - unforgettable!! We very soon got very lost and experienced very interesting parts of Venice that hardly any tourists visit. We ended up at "Harrys Bar" and later with a nice dinner. Peace be with you, Donald, and thank you again for giving me such very, very fond memories. Abbracio, Edle

Edle Ravndal
Norwegian Institute for Alcohol and Drug Research, University of Oslo, Norway

I will miss Don. He was a man with a great heart and an impressing charisma.
his warm feelings and sympathy, he shared with me,a german collegue, whenever we met, i will never forget. Thank you for all you gave me.

Martin Däumling
TC Grafrath, Germany

Don's Eagleville friends and former colleagues thank you for your loving messages and memories. We are getting great comfort from all of you. When Don was diagnosed with cancer, in the spring, a few of us began visiting him in his home often. One day, he said to me and his former administrative assistant, Betty Jaworski, "I don't want a funeral. I want a party. I want an Eagleville reunion. When you're dead and in the box, you don't hear the wonderful things that everyone says about you. I want to feel the love. I want a party now. I want an Eagleville reunion." I said, "you want a party? We'll have a party. Who do you want to come?" Everybody, was his response. Six weeks later, at the home of Bob and Marianne Schiller, about 100 former Eagleville staff members and patients came to say farewell, and to honor Don. One man, Sylvester Outley, flew in from Texas. Joe and Florence Ershun flew from Mexico, where they have retired. Phyllis and David York, who formed Tough Love after many years on Eagleville's staff, came, and Phylliss is in a wheelchair and three men had to carry her up the steps into the house. It was an Eagleville reunion, a community meeting, a love-fest for Donald. First, Don held court as if he were running the community meeting. Then people started sharing their memories. One man sang out, "You saved my life!" Though our hosts had several tables set up with refreshments,in many rooms and even outdoors, nobody moved from the room where Don held court, sitting in a comfortable easy chair. It was a hot, humid day. Nobody wanted to miss a moment with Don.

Sissy Carpey
Eagleville, USA

Although I met Don only once - in Rome - I had the chance to appreciate his deep knowledge and experience about therapeutic communities along with his great interest about the development of TC model, that made him one of the pioneers of TC movement around the world.

Phoebus Zafiridis
Founder, KETHEA, Greece

I too am saddened by the loss of a great man and leader in our field. It is at the same time heart warming to see the likeness in responses from the world community. Truly the sign of a genuine life. From the time I was a patient through my years on the Eagleville staff, Don has been part of who I am and what I do. I am so grateful to have had several opportunities to be with him in the last year and I will, as all of you, miss him.

Dennis Deal
Eagleville, USA

Don was a wonderful friend, mentor and inspiration during the ten years I was his executive sectretary, as well as during the many years since he left Eagleville Hospital. He was a great example of love and courage, and I truly miss him.

Betty Lee Jaworski
Eagleville, USA

Don's passing marks the end of an era both personally and professionally and I shall sorely miss him. I met Don in the late 1960's when drug abuse first became an "issue" politically in the suburbs of Phildelphia. Who knew anything about the topic, if not Don! My interest was in prevention and research, and Don, ever the forward thinking educator, not only became a mentor, but included me in many Eagleville conferences. Were it not for his scientific knowledge, politcal astuteness, and humanitarian policies, I do not believe that Pennsylvania would have become the leader nationally in mandating coordinated and integrated prevention, intervention, treatment and rehabilitation services. On a personal note, Don was probably the last living internist who was trained by my father, Sidney Harberg, as a specialist in tuberculosis. We discovered this when he once asked my maiden name. Eagleville was originally a hospital for treatment of tuberculos!... and it was Don's vision that saved the hospital from becoming an outdated sanatorium to being a great TC community. So thanks for eveything Don. You will always have a place in my heart.

Ruth DuBois
Corporate Alliance for Drug Education, Philadelpha, USA

Before the concept of "mentor" was codified, he was one to me and so many, many others. By the strength of his character as a caring humanitarian he taught us and we learned the meaning of true dignity for each individual. Being the consumate teacher in life, he also taught us how to "let go" in the way he chose to say "farewell". He is gone from amongst us; we shall not see the likes of him again.

Bernard S. Sobel
Eagleville, USA

My Uncle Donald knew all about being an uncle, but he was much more than an uncle to me, as I lost my father 35 years ago. Donald was the person to whom I turned for advice and wisdom (as my husband and I are also in the human services). He was a part of all our family celebrations, the essence of kindness and generosity with his support, advice and unconditional love. A few days after he died, as his sister and children and I were making some order of his kitchen (not his strong suit - he had others), outside the sliding glass doors where he had his bird feeders (as he was dying, his window on the natural world), a large deer appeared and stood for the longest time on the rise, just looking at us looking at him. A sign, perhaps?

Margot Wizansky
Donald's Neice. Piladelphia, USA

Before the concept of "mentor" was codified, he was one to me and so many, many others. By the strength of his character as a caring humanitarian he taught us and we learned the meaning of true dignity for each individual. Being the consumate teacher in life, he also taught us how to "let go" in the way he chose to say "farewell". He is gone from amongst us; we shall not see the likes of him again.

Bernard S. Sobel
Eagleville, USA

Charles Kaplan
University of Texas, USA

Jan Chambers
A friend, Philadelphia, USA

Ed Foley
Eagleville, USA

Bob Schiller
Eagleville, USA

Betty Jaworski
Eagleville, USA

Betty Lee Jaworski
Eagleville, USA

George De Leon
Center for Therapeutic Community Research, USA

Bill Adams
Talkeetna Computer Services, Alaska, USA

View other TC pioneer remembrance pages here